generation g

i hate douchebags...not just because of what they wear...and not because of how they act...but because of the things they ruin (and the things they wear, and how they act)....

there are certain things in the world that all of us should be able to enjoy....but we can't...and the only reason we can't...is because of douchebags...they ruin so much...

so let's take a look at 9 things i might like more if douchebags had not totally ruined them....

1. sunglasses

let's face it...sunglasses are handy to have on a bright sunny day...but i'll be damned if i am going to wear them...because i do not want to look like some douchebag trying way too hard to be cool....give it up fellas..


2. ballcaps

anyone who watches the summit computer studio cam knows i love to wear hats...but, sadly, the douchebags have claimed the ballcap as their own...and now...there is no way i would wear one in public...


3. sports cars

i like sports cars..i even drive a firebird...but thanks to douchebags...i now have to walk a fine line..if you step out of a super nice sports car people automatically think you are "lacking" in some areas...so thanks douchebags, now i am not getting that corvette i always wanted...


4. pretty girls

now come on...we all like pretty girls...but for some un-godly reason...pretty girls seem to really like douchebags...i have no idea why...just ask mandi michaels (she LOVES the douchebag type)...but it's not just mandi...britney spears could have had any man on earth and she chose kevin federline...that guy is the text book definition of douchebag....why?...god i hate douchebags...


5. the bluetooth headset

the bluetooth headset is nothing short of a technological marvel....and i will admit i have one tucked away at home that i have played with..but there is no chance in hell i would ever use that thing anywhere outside the house..and you know why?...because every douchebag on the planet is walking around with one trying to look important...so yeah..i will just keep that little piece of engineering genius hidden away...thanks again douchebags...


6. batman

seriously...someone please kill this guy before he actually does ruin batman...i swear..if you douchebags ruin batman i will blow up every hair gel factory in the united states...THEN WHAT?!?!


7. starbucks

coffee is good...hot chocolate is good...fresh muffins, brownies, and cookies are all very good.....but you know what sucks?...starbucks...and you know why?...douchebags....there is always some douchebag in there and he is always doing one of two things...sitting on his laptop trying desperately to seem like he has something really important to do...or he is standing at the counter with a popped collar (another sure sign of a douchebag) trying to order something in "starbucks lingo" to impress the 90 lb over tanned girl he is with....


8. the 5 o'clock shadow

i am not sure how this one leaked into the douchebag community..it was invented for the sole purpose of the "dirt bag" look (that's a whole different blog post)....but the idea was to always look a little dirty and rough....but for whatever reason....they took this too..now every douchebag in the u.s. has a 5 o'clock shadow....they used to all sport the chin straps...but the lead singer of mercyme ruined that...and the chin straps take work, and douchebags are lazy...so the 5 o'clock shadow is now ruined...another one for the douchebags...


9. my job

ahhh the leader of them all...if the douchebags had a king..it would be ryan seacrest...and thank you ryan...you have actually made it un-cool to be a dj....you suck!


is there something that douchebags have ruined for you?....please share.....

god i hate douchebags...

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Comment by Greg Bjorg on May 16, 2022 at 12:18pm

I am doubly unlucky as I am quite religious. but now they are more relaxed about it and I can tell you that nowadays, it's not that hard to find Muslim clothing on the internet. You can check out Amani's store and get a great Abaya withoout any problems, I can tell you that gifting a hijab is something very precious.

Comment by Charlie Flint on May 16, 2022 at 11:16am

It seems to me that all kinds of clothes have been ruined on the Internet, there is a meme for every piece of clothing.

Comment by Anji Holthouse on February 26, 2014 at 12:03am

all the good things and the bad things that may be...

let's talk abooouuut dbags...

Comment by K-Magic-J on July 13, 2010 at 10:52am
douchebags...really? I have to say no to Ryan Seacrest being one, but other than that....it's all a matter of opinion...are there any douchebags at G1013? I hope those douchebags don't mess with iPads or classic show tees like cookie monster or droopy. Oh, douchebags better watch out for me if they even hint at loving droopy...
Comment by Jennifer Little-Mann on April 14, 2010 at 4:57pm
What about chick douchebags.... They have ruined plastic framed glasses for me. It's almost impossible to find a pair that arn't bedazzled..
Comment by Chad on March 5, 2009 at 11:11am
If douchebags start messing with my GPS, so help me....
Comment by Rick Duncan on March 4, 2009 at 9:46am
Preach on, Brother Dave!
Comment by LeeAnn on March 3, 2009 at 11:12pm
I just want to comment on the little earwig phone thingys...convenient, yes..I've had many occasions I could have used one.. but dammit, these people go beyond being douchebags! They must always talk LOUDLY..because they are SO important, and in very public places where everyone else is being pretty quiet (like the doctors waiting room). Loud talkers bug me anyway...but when they're speaking with someone invisible, I just want to smack that sucker right into their ear canal with a rubber mallott. Ok. I'm done now.
Comment by Mandi Michaels on March 3, 2009 at 2:21pm
I came up with the sunglasses! lol :) great blog idea Davey. now add the Bachelor!!!! it's new name Dbaggery.
Comment by jess marie ✂ on March 3, 2009 at 1:22pm
lmao kelly, wow.

this blog is amazing.
i love it.

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